News:

Our standings are starting to elongate and separate into three distinct packs. Three teams lead the way at 6-1 while another four have coagulated like Thanksgiving gravy into a bit of a fantasy football support group at the bottom. That leaves the middling group in the middle (duh!) who are wondering if things are going to get better or worse.

In the NFL the news other than injuries is contract extensions and trade talks. The most recent one is a rumour of the Rams and Vikings swapping QBs. A few short years ago I would have laughed at the suggestion but honestly nothing would surprise me now. Is it just me or does anyone else miss the days where the idea of a Darryl Sittler or Guy Lafleur in their prime playing on the opposite team was just never going to happen? I do.

Random Thought of the Week:

Compared to some my season isn’t even going all that badly, so when I share this opinion, it isn’t merely fuelled by the recency or bitterness of my own luck. The injuries in the NFL have escalated to the point where I feel like I may need to reframe this hobby in my own mind in order to continue enjoying it.

When you’re preparing for the fantasy draft, it’s fun to identify the teams you expect to be great, as well as the ones that might be great and of course, ordering them on down to the fairly hopeless causes. From there you start circling names of players you want and players you don’t. If you enjoy that exercise as much as I do, it’s obviously hard to love rolling into Week 8 starting Ray Ray McCloud or Jalen McMillan (fine Scottish lads though they may be).

We’ve reached that familiar point in a season where, like crabs in a bucket, the San Frans and Tampas are being dragged down into mediocrity because they are running out of players. There’s always been a dart throw or “week to week” aspect to this hobby but now it’s not enough to merely tolerate it. I’m going to need to learn to like (or even love) that part of it. A project for the off season I guess…

Shark Move of the Week:

Standout special teams decisions this week include Brandon starting the Broncos DEF against the scuffling Saints for a cool 21 points and Archie combining Boswell and Indy DEF for a point advantage that was pretty much the difference in his matchup against Scott. The winner this week though is Brian, who got 21 points out of Dicker the kicker and showed some nerves of steel starting the Vikings DEF against Detroit. That’s not exactly a textbook matchup but it worked out for him, for a total of 31 points from the end of his line-up.

Pro tip: If you are just rolling out “whoever” in those positions, it might be time to invest a bit more energy into special teams because the best ones are easily outscoring most of our flex starters.

Guppy Move of the Week:

Not that it really mattered but I was a bit salty about Deebo suiting up to play when he was sick enough with pneumonia to be hospitalized after the game. Sorry, but that’s not an “illness”, that’s a decoy and should be fine-able by the league.

I don’t know if this is guppy-esque or fantasy hell-esque but I am wondering how Scott managed to start three RBs and one of them was not Kareem Hunt coming off a 30 carry, 20+ point game? I look at his starting line-up and bench last week and it reminds me of those Whack-A-Mole games at the fair. Nearly as many points on your bench as in your line-up means you’re just trying to figure out whose turn it is to have a good game.

Smack Talk Award of the Week:

At the risk of being Captain Obvious, the general tone of our chat this weekend was not exactly what I’d call “swagger”. It felt a bit more like a support group than anything and why wouldn’t it? Some of us are right there with the NFL coaches and GMs of the teams our players play on, watching our seasons circle the bowl after another Sunday flush.

Welcome to Fantasy Hell Award of the Week:

Watching Grid and Piper drop Aiyuk and Godwin yesterday felt a little like The Big Lebowski, the scene where they spread Donnie’s ashes at the beach. Good night, sweet prince.

I watch the Red Zone channel a lot, which jumps around from game to game constantly but against all odds, I did happen to see Deshaun Watson’s Achilles tendon snap in real time – as in I literally saw it move and thought Ew.. that’s not good.

Considering how my matchup against the champ was going at that particular point in time, I felt like that tendon and I had a lot in common. Watson’s been terrible this year and I can’t help wondering if that tendon gave itself up so his suffering could finally end? Looking on the bright side though, he has 200+ million dollars in the bank and the best doctors and therapists. The rest of us have a minimum of seven more weeks of football to suffer through.

Anyway, enough rambling! It’s mostly been a two horse race in the fantasy hell column this year and I’ve tried to alternate between Jay and Doug as best I can. 0 – 7 is rough, as is passing the 1000 points against mark in Week 7. I’m going to go with Piper this week though, in keeping with the theme of mercy killings. Aiyuk wasn’t good this year and quickly became a classic roster clogger – too “good” to drop but too bad to start. Now at least Piper’s roster is clogged no more and if his trade with the Dawgs is any indication, he still has some fight left!